The no-crosstalk norm at AA meetings

The no-crosstalk norm at AA meetings discourages members from giving one another advice during discussion. In the meeting described, the response to a member’s account was not instruction but attentive listening and the sharing of similar experiences, making testimony rather than direct counsel the group’s mode of exchange.

Practice at the Meeting

When John Dalton described misplacing an expensive watch his wife had given him, he connected the loss to memories of his drinking and drug use. The other attendees nodded and shared similar stories of guilt-driven deceit. No one offered advice: the meeting treated that kind of response as crosstalk and frowned on it. John listened with his head down and his hands clasped between his knees.

Effects and Limits

The norm shaped the meeting’s response without guaranteeing that it would comfort the person speaking. After the group passed its contribution basket, John thanked everyone for their input, but Dan Torrance doubted that it had helped him much. The scene thus distinguishes the practice of hearing one another’s experiences from the more immediate, and potentially intrusive, act of telling someone what to do.